Saturday, January 10, 2009

white winter hymnal.

i wonder how come we have to hit 'the bottom' so often before we can really begin to move forward? and out of these broken places come the loveliest of things. i really am, in many ways, annoyed by this fact. but a fact it is. and i've written a new song. all in one night. music and lyrics and i'm kind of in love with it. and best of all, it's in a key i've never been so good at. so, i guess it's all worth it for that.

fleet foxes have been keeping me company.
[if you take the best parts of these songs. the sweeping, breathtaking parts. that's what it feels like. if feeling could sing, that's what it would sound like underneath my skin.]

i can't believe what a hardened girl i've become over the past couple of years, i think. i can't believe how many dreams i've let die, because of what i've been so afraid will never come. so, it's been strange coming back to the start of things. the real heart desires. because, in this place, they aren't clouded. they aren't diluted. they're as strong as ever, and beating brightly in my chest. and that's absolutely wonderful. and absolutely terrifying all at the very same time.

there's nothing left to do, but believe something bigger.

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