do you ever wonder? no. no. no!

today is tuesday, january 27, 2008.
and these are my thoughts:

• it's snowing... and it's beautiful out.
• but, inside i feel gross. physically and heart-ily.
• though when i'm feeling better, all i want is a place to dance around to this new franz ferdinand record. i can't even deal with it...good heavens.
• i left work early and nearly crashed at least 3 times. for some reason, the roads were just crazy slippery... though, it wasn't icy or slushy, really... gosh, i should have turned around this morning.
• i saw your picture and i got all weak in the knees-like. but, mostly i wonder how you are. i should call you today and see how life is.
• i saw pictures of jordan and aaron and i wanted to cry. because i miss them. there's a full-on void in my heart.
• i saw pictures of my friends and i wanted to have them around. to just be in the same room.
• i conversated with a couple of guys, and afterward i just felt sick...
• partly because it makes me miss someone who's conversations always left me smiling and deeply happy and feeling uplifted, as opposed to the aforementioned causing annoyance and nausea.
• oh, and no. i am not interested.
• i would like a good night of sleep. where i wake up feeling refreshed.
• why do i always want to just run?
• i wish my chest would stop hurting.
• i wish i could have c.s. lewis as a dad. or you know, a second dad or something.
• i'm staying in bed. it's nicer in here.

good afternoon. good evening. and goodnight.