Tuesday, November 25, 2008

I either want to look like an excellently dressed boy or a kitten from the 1960s...

oh alexa freakin' chung.
can i be absolutely unoriginal for 30 seconds and say, that i'd like this for christmas?

thanks, i'm done.
so, all of this time on my hands leaves a lot of room for 4 things...
  • working on music
  • going to the gym
  • reading
  • thinking

sleeping has dropped from my list of priorites. and so has coffee drinking, actually. hmmm. i went to the gym tonight, came home and was absolutely amped out of my mind. i put on some bbc (bombay bicycle club), the rifles, and early maccabees and just jumped around faux-dancing to make my mom and grandma laugh for ages. i'm still not tired.
and i find myself lying awake in bed all night just reading til my eyes refuse to focus, or i toss and turn with unfinished song ideas on the raging seas of self-analyzing thoughts.
but, as i said in an earlier post, i feel comfortable in my own skin for the first time in years! and while this is absolutely liberating, it's also a bit perplexing. i have so many different facets that make up who i am, and i've been trying to figure out where that fits in with the world around me... trying to delete the bits i don't like, or that may not be as popular or whatever the heck i was thinking. lately, it feels like a season of self-discovery. embracing all of these facets. all of these colours. grasping the edges of the fact that i have all of these pieces for a reason. to stop picking the parts i love and heralding them and picking the parts i hate and burying them. but to just be ok with all of these things. be ok with the fact that i am a work in progress. to revel in the fact that i am an intricately designed creation... and stop trying to fit myself into the mold of another or limit myself because i'm unsure of what i see...or how i think others perceive me.

in short...'i need to be myself. i can't be no one else'
ah, so simple and yet, so true. what is this quote the gallaghers week?!
'i'm feeling supersonic, you can have it all but, how much do you want it?'
and finally... words like 'perceive' remind me of this:

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