Tuesday, November 2, 2010

chipping nail varnish.

so in case anyone else was wondering, i was a 60s... sort of a factory girl, if you will. miss sedgwick was probably the muse for many things. nonetheless... that was that.
i decided, however, to be a cat for work...

everyone is talking about the mumford & sons show.
it makes my heart fly up in my throat and then drop to my shoes.
sort of like being on a roller-coaster. absence makes the heart grow fonder, i suppose.
and i really wish my heart felt warm and not roller-coaster-ish at present.
glad you all enjoyed it, though.
meanwhile, my nail varnish/polish is chipping. i hate that a lot. but i'm always incredibly lazy about taking it off.

it seems i've made it by the skin of my teeth this month. you know, with the bills bills bills. but then again, not exactly.
in general, i feel like something has got to give.
somehow i have the feeling that the 'something' is probably me.
(remember in the old bugs bunny cartoons when someone would say... "i have a feeling someone is about to get hoit [hurt]... and that someone is prrrobably me." hahaha
i'm doing a lot of striving.
my best friends and even my grandma have told me i need to stop.
one-a-those easier said than done things, eh? yes.
i had a dream the other night, that i was looking in the mirror and i couldn't see myself straight. i was wearing these crooked glasses, and i couldn't fix them. every pair i'd try on were wrecked and i couldn't see myself clearly at all. i saw everyone else just fine, but myself... so distorted.
everything about that dream is true.
i just want to hide... and take this nail varnish off.

and sleep, and not wake up with an elephant on my chest and bees in my stomach.
in other news:
i like the new n.e.r.d record. it's realllllll fun.
i'll probably be listening to it all day.


MeLissa said...

Easier said than done.
But give yourself a chance to breathe.
Give yourself a break from worry and remember that worry adds nothing to you. You're secure, ma'am.

May the Lord watch you and keep you.

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