Tuesday, October 27, 2009

comes a time.

There are a few legendary singers that I’ve never really been into. Not that they aren’t wonderful… I’ve just never really ‘gotten it’ before. And there are moments when you try it again, and you find your taste buds have changed… and this whole new world has opened up.

This has begun to happen over the last 2 weeks with Neil Young.
Where have I been all my life!
Oh my what?!

I am also happy to say that I’ve reached the end of my rope.
Happy?
Yes.
Correct.
I’ve been trying too hard. I’ve been heaving around ridiculous weights I was never meant to carry.
(Anyone else noticed that playing God is the worst game EVER?)

Why?
I’m so busy trying to perfect this person so that you’ll love me… so that you'll approve of me, and just maybe I won't be so very lonely. And in this mad process, I’ve started to lose me... and become this 'image' and i'm not really sure who that is. Like I'm trying to make a new skin. No wonder I've gotten so uncomfortable.

ugh. this has become too much about me. and that's not even what love is.

And you know what? Whether I see it or not, and feel it or not... everything is going to be ok.
All of this will be made right.
All will be well.
ALL of it.


"we were right. we were giving. that's how we kept what we gave away"

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