Thursday, January 12, 2012

there's a lot of tension in these shoulders and it builds when i'm awake and when i sleep.
and all-a-that stunts your growth, kid. well, except the growth of love handles.
i'd like to find the perfect red varnish and get a manicure. an excuse to put on makeup and heels and a dress and curl my hair that grew about 4 inches overnight. ok, but seriously. a few extra bucks in the bank to spend and not regret. a frame on which to put those clothes.
i rolled myself up in blankets. tried to switch off, but only the blankets switched.
yours. vs. mine.
but no one is really sleeping anymore. and all-a-that takes its toll, kid.
i rounded the corner and saw it all on display. started second-guessing. i'm a pro at that.
pretty soon, we'll all decide to move on and just go crazy. pretty soon the girls will be women who are adored and bloom and they'll stay or go. and pretty soon all of those boys will grow up to be men. good ones or bad ones. all depends on if they can use some self-control and get some glasses to see humans with value. or is it a world to be conquered with distinct highly evolved mammals. dumb it down and stay a little boy. face the difficulty... carry the integrity... relearn honor and you'll be a man, after all.
i wanna walk out of this door and find myself on the high street, instead. and stand out in the crowds of people. the rain is just about to stop. and there's that darling little flower stand. lilies. lilies. lilies.
and all of those words like truths dancing around in my head.
a pocketful of messages from a life full of friends.
and the way my hand feels small in yours.
a thousand ways to feel treasured.
i matter.
day dreaming. wide awake.
but it's all a bit overlooked and passed by.
don't worry, it's real easy to forget these things.
and that puts a little more tightness in the chest. and it builds when i'm awake or asleep.
and all-a-that stunts your growth, kid.

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