This is an exerpt from my friend Seth's blog... written by his father a couple of years ago.
Seth has always used his sarcasm as a defense mechanism. That used to bother me. No longer does it bother me because we all have our defense mechanisms, and I know Seth’s heart. Regardless of how a person behaves, or what you think he thinks, and what you think you know about a person, if their heart is right - all is good with the world.
Seth’s heart has always been right. No one I know has a bigger or a more tender heart. I know because I have one, too. No one I know wears it on their sleeve more than my wonderful son, Seth. When you have a “right” heart, it will always be compassionate for those things that are worth being compassionate about. It will always care way more deeply than most hearts. It will also be broken way more than one can sometimes handle. It will always be in a position to be damaged.
When Seth’s heart is broken, it comes from a deep sense of validation. I so relate to this because all my life I have worked to prove myself to anyone who will pay attention. Parents, teachers, coaches, professors, friends, colleagues……..I have never felt that I could or would measure up, so………I convinced myself that if I work harder than the others, I will be appreciated - validated.
I am so sorry that I have lived my life this way for way too many years. I am sorry that I have worked myself into sickness for what I believed was what I was supposed to do at that time.
I so NOT desire that for my son - or any of my sons. I don’t regret caring for people, and serving them as Christ would serve them, but I have to believe I could have taken a more healthy approach to doing those things.
So, please, Seth - learn from that! Don’t worry about validation. Don’t worry about being appreciated. It will NEVER be enough. Most people are too busy dealing with their own “stuff” to concern themselves with appreciating your art. Sorry - brutal, but true.
Instead, concern yourself with being appreciated by only God Himself. For all the triteness of that phrase, it could not be more profound. If what you create pleases Him, then that really is all that matters…….