ground control to major tom.

the flight was pretty empty. less than half the plane, i'd say. so as soon as the 'fasten seatbelts' light went off, everyone jumped up and ran for the center isles. so i found myself curled up across 3 seats, drifting off to sleep with the sound of kids running around, excited that they were staying up late and watching movies and things. so when i woke up, i felt very much like snow white, to see all of these babies and kids tucked in blankets in the seats and isles around me. so cute.

the steward that was in charge of everything came by and offered me a warm fruit muffin from the business class... which he strangely didn't do with anyone else. sweet as pie. went through customs (strangely fast) and then headed out to see my name on a card in the hands of a driver. and off i we went to this parking garage, where a black mercedes awaited.

no, none of this was a dream.

the exit has this twisty thing that looks like a spiral staircase. but instead of stairs, you drive round and round like a playschool toy for toddlers. fun, but makes you a bit woozy.

so i've just discovered that i'm having the day off today. which is strange, as i'm not really sure what i'm going to do with myself. probably go looking for some sort of ensemble for the meeting tomorrow and photos. gah! AND i'm on a quest for a coffee table for the boys. under £200 pounds... a conversational piece and match the current decor. and i am up for the challenge.

the more time i spend here, the more i realise it's absolutely where i'm meant to be. but, for so many reasons this will be easier said than done. ugh.

still nervous and slightly cynical about many of the goings on... which i'd really like to be full-on excited about. but things change so quickly. everything you think you have figured out, changes and just isn't at all.

i'm just trying to do the best i can with everything that's coming along, but i'm feeling insecure about a lot of things too. and feeling confused. walking a strange line of trying to be understanding, and not offended, and yet not be made a fool of.

many things swirling around my brain.

alas. i'm off to explore.